This parent basher gives me too much credit. Perhaps she should change the name of her blog to: A bra that fits, a can opener that works, and somebody elses kid.
**LK, I give you NO credit at all, other than your ignorance of the other side of the coin. Which by the way, never ceases to amaze me. You do know there are people out there who can not and will not take care of their kids. Meth addicts and crack addicts don't pay taxes, I find. So let's not say they contribute via their tax paying. I dare you to raise an infant/Toddler on 250.00 a month. Please include in your calculations: FORMULA, bottles, clothes,(not dollar store or Goodwill) DIAPERS, wipes, daycare (because someone has to work to pay for this) older babies & toddlers need baby food, age proper snacks, sippy cups, more clothes, shoes, transportation to see the parents, your time and gas to do so. Taking time off work for multiple Dr visits, because they are always sick & never up to date on anything. Of course you'll need time and gas for that too. There is so much more, but I'll let you do the calculations for just these "few" things for now. Please do, get back to me on how your budget comes out. By my calculations over the years it comes out that I pay about 150.00 per month to be able to be a foster parent to children who have NO parents or relatives who can or will take them in. By the way, the children leave my house with more than they ever came here with. If you don't count the health, love and stable home they have while here. Be nice, I posted your comment. Now your turn. I enjoy your blog, I really do. I don't think kids should be in foster care a day longer than it takes parents with REAL issues to get their act together & we both know there is a need for foster care under the right circumstances. Not all foster parents are crazy or horrible.
D, I for a fact know that they get more then the 250 a month you are stating. in family foster care my mother receives $2,000 a month in checks for 4 children. thats 500 per child and that is less then what they pay non family foster care which is bottom dollar 700 in this state. then you add in the food stamps and clothing vouchers and gas vouchers school supplies and presents vouchers medicaid.... this is while her husband makes 1200 A WEEK so its not income based.
Last foster mother to care for my children was getting 2,800 a month for 4 children plus all the other freebie stuff. That was her income which she would skip across state line every friday to the casinos and blow the money earned of off the children.
Her aging mother and adopted daughter and her 12 year old adopted son would be left with the children. The son would molest the children while watching porn movies and the daughter would use my youngest in state "care" as a kick bag. the children was all malnourished when taken from the home as well.
So LK is not making things up. Ive seen this myself.
I live in northern Canada and have seen both sides of the coin when it comes to kids in foster care. No, not all foster parents are horrid and not all kids who are apprehended should be. However, think of the kids who shouldn't be with their parents but are.
My mother is a foster parent, yes, she gets paid for it. Yes, she loves each one of those little guys as much as if they were her own...I've seen her cry when they leave, even as she sighs a breath of relief for the small respite she'll get in between kids.
Every single kid my mother has had go through her home was severely neglected. None of them was where they ought to be, developmentally. Some have been abused. Most were not up to date with any of their shots or what most of us would consider 'normal' care. (And the shots were not a matter of conscious choice, either.)And most of their biological parents are addicts of one thing or another. One little fellow's mom didn't want him because the boyfriend didn't like him. It's very sad to see.
And I know the system we have in place is flawed. My kids were in foster care for a year, with a supervision order in place for 6 months after that, all because two people were willing to say that I neglected and abused my kids. I have seen what was said, by the way, and I know who said it, too. But there were extenuating circumstances (my ex paid off the social worker...I do know this for a FACT). I have been angry about this for a long time, but even so, I think foster parents need to be given a lot of credit because they take in these kids to love and care for, only to surely lose them.
They lose them because ultimately, most of these poor little kids get returned to their neglectful, abusive, addicted parents because the parents have taken a course or managed to stay sober long enough to convince a judge that they've changed, only to grab a bottle of booze or a needle the minute the kid is back home.
I don't have the answer, except to remind each and every parent; natural and foster, to love their kids and bend over backward for them, to give them the fighting chance they need to make it in this very tough world!
**LK, I give you NO credit at all, other than your ignorance of the other side of the coin. Which by the way, never ceases to amaze me. You do know there are people out there who can not and will not take care of their kids. Meth addicts and crack addicts don't pay taxes, I find. So let's not say they contribute via their tax paying.
ReplyDeleteI dare you to raise an infant/Toddler on 250.00 a month. Please include in your calculations: FORMULA, bottles, clothes,(not dollar store or Goodwill) DIAPERS, wipes, daycare (because someone has to work to pay for this) older babies & toddlers need baby food, age proper snacks, sippy cups, more clothes, shoes, transportation to see the parents, your time and gas to do so. Taking time off work for multiple Dr visits, because they are always sick & never up to date on anything. Of course you'll need time and gas for that too. There is so much more, but I'll let you do the calculations for just these "few" things for now. Please do, get back to me on how your budget comes out. By my calculations over the years it comes out that I pay about 150.00 per month to be able to be a foster parent to children who have NO parents or relatives who can or will take them in.
By the way, the children leave my house with more than they ever came here with. If you don't count the health, love and stable home they have while here.
Be nice, I posted your comment. Now your turn.
I enjoy your blog, I really do. I don't think kids should be in foster care a day longer than it takes parents with REAL issues to get their act together & we both know there is a need for foster care under the right circumstances.
Not all foster parents are crazy or horrible.
D,
ReplyDeleteI for a fact know that they get more then the 250 a month you are stating. in family foster care my mother receives $2,000 a month in checks for 4 children. thats 500 per child and that is less then what they pay non family foster care which is bottom dollar 700 in this state. then you add in the food stamps and clothing vouchers and gas vouchers school supplies and presents vouchers medicaid....
this is while her husband makes 1200 A WEEK so its not income based.
Last foster mother to care for my children was getting 2,800 a month for 4 children plus all the other freebie stuff. That was her income which she would skip across state line every friday to the casinos and blow the money earned of off the children.
Her aging mother and adopted daughter and her 12 year old adopted son would be left with the children. The son would molest the children while watching porn movies and the daughter would use my youngest in state "care" as a kick bag. the children was all malnourished when taken from the home as well.
So LK is not making things up. Ive seen this myself.
I live in northern Canada and have seen both sides of the coin when it comes to kids in foster care. No, not all foster parents are horrid and not all kids who are apprehended should be. However, think of the kids who shouldn't be with their parents but are.
ReplyDeleteMy mother is a foster parent, yes, she gets paid for it. Yes, she loves each one of those little guys as much as if they were her own...I've seen her cry when they leave, even as she sighs a breath of relief for the small respite she'll get in between kids.
Every single kid my mother has had go through her home was severely neglected. None of them was where they ought to be, developmentally. Some have been abused. Most were not up to date with any of their shots or what most of us would consider 'normal' care. (And the shots were not a matter of conscious choice, either.)And most of their biological parents are addicts of one thing or another. One little fellow's mom didn't want him because the boyfriend didn't like him. It's very sad to see.
And I know the system we have in place is flawed. My kids were in foster care for a year, with a supervision order in place for 6 months after that, all because two people were willing to say that I neglected and abused my kids. I have seen what was said, by the way, and I know who said it, too. But there were extenuating circumstances (my ex paid off the social worker...I do know this for a FACT). I have been angry about this for a long time, but even so, I think foster parents need to be given a lot of credit because they take in these kids to love and care for, only to surely lose them.
They lose them because ultimately, most of these poor little kids get returned to their neglectful, abusive, addicted parents because the parents have taken a course or managed to stay sober long enough to convince a judge that they've changed, only to grab a bottle of booze or a needle the minute the kid is back home.
I don't have the answer, except to remind each and every parent; natural and foster, to love their kids and bend over backward for them, to give them the fighting chance they need to make it in this very tough world!