Legally Kidnapped

Shattering Your Child Welfare Delusions Since 2007


Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Right after I posted a link to an article about a foster parent who gets 25 years for sexually abusing foster kids in his care, I come across this...

Foster Care: Love Plain and Simple

And thus we have proof that some people will never learn. Also, we have proof that some people never want to let go of YOUR children.
With the case of these two little boys, I was told that they could be in our home anywhere from 6 months to a year. It was not my ideal dream, because I didn’t want to ever have to let go of any child that we would have placed with us, but there was always the possibility that the rights of the biological parents would be terminated. If they were in our home, we would be the first to have the option of adopting them.
This person goes on to say...
These two little boys- our first two foster children- are black. For the record, my husband and I are very white! I was told in the initial phone call their race, and it never fazed me. I did not care what color their skin was! I just wanted to love them!
Is this not just a little creepy? Do you think the kids cared? If an African American child is ripped from his African American family, do you really think it is a good option to place him with people of a different race or perhaps even culture, or rather a middle/upper class white woman who just want's to "Love them and never let them go?"

You see folks. Many of these people become foster caregivers for the wrong reasons. And I could list a few of them off for you, but there really is no need. I'm sure you get the point.

The right reason to become a foster parent is to help a child or a family in need, and thus perhaps some standard of professionalism is needed in the field.

Now, in her article, this woman goes on to discuss her views on racism. Perhaps that's the point of her article, I don't know. Or perhaps she want's to be viewed as normal while running a multi-race foster warehouse, again I don't know, but normal would be to raise and care for your own children which is clearly not the case here.

And like it or not, people are gonna notice and some of those people are not very nice or accepting of these sorts of things. Many lack understanding and tolerance. Some are just plain ignorant.

One Saturday, we took the boys to eat pizza. I was oblivious to everything and everyone around me. I was a mommy, and I was enjoying every single moment of it! As we were leaving, I could feel my husband’s tension. I asked him what was wrong. He said nothing was wrong, but I knew better. Something was just not right with him! I knew that there were no conflicts between the two of us; the boys had been perfect little angels; and there had not been any conflict that I could see while we were eating. As I continued to question him, he told me we just needed to leave.

I finished wiping up the boys, and we headed out the door. My husband told me he would tell me what was going on when we got in the car.

Once we got the boys buckled into their car seats, and were driving away, he told me that there was an older white man in the restaurant that seemed to be appalled that we- a white couple- had two black children. My husband said every time I would wipe one of the boy’s faces, or give them a kiss, or tickle them, or whatever else I would do with them, he would grumble and scowl at me. He said it was all he could do to keep his mouth shut and not tell the man off.

Now, personally I have no issue with multiracial adoption or foster care. At least no more than I do with adoption or foster care in general. But the fact of the matter is that some people do and if that is a path that you choose then that is a fact of life that you will have to accept. You can not change the beliefs and views of the ignorant and as much as I would love to see an end to racism, as long as people are somewhat given the choice, some will choose the wrong path. That's just the way it is.

What I take issue with is the fact that so many of these foster caregivers see these kids as their own from day one, when they are not. That sort of mentality can be a very real nightmare for any real parent.

4 comments:

  1. Anonymous2:07 PM

    The ultimate racist act is the destruction of the black family. How do you do that? Take the kids, and put them in foster care. Better yet, put them with a white family, who gets a check- the same financial benefit denied to the real parents- and really screw their identity. Are they white? Are they black? Are they rich? Are they poor? Who the heck are they?

    ReplyDelete
  2. How about putting some Hispanic kids with a foster father who claims their culture is violent and abusive! Ya, that's in their best interests.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I just do not get you, LK.

    I spend all my time coming up with catchy names for theories and you just do not seem to remember them when you are so eloquently and logically attacking the Imperialistic Morality Parade (IMP).

    Beverly Tran

    ReplyDelete
  4. You question my brilliance Ms Tran?

    ReplyDelete

Guess what

It Could Happen To You